Diane Farr is the poor man's Kim Raver

According to imdb pro, they are only 22 spaces apart in the star rating.

I've been cathing up on the show Rescue Me. Never saw it until now.

Nothing else is new. The condo going up behind our apartment it now halfway up. It'll soon be 8 stories. Forget lost sunlight, I'll just be happy to not hear the construction every freakin' morning, Saturdays included.

Weekend Observation...

Not to be in poor taste about a God-damn, awful, disgusting person and the vile situation of this all, but the below picture of that Canadian pedophile captured in Thailand got me thinking.



Is Moby going on tour?

Rick Aviles was the poor man's Luis Guzman

Ricky Martin is the poor man's Enrique Iglesias

Because of Anna Kournikova.

And also because his father has loved a lot of girls before.

The Oak Ridge Boys are the poor man's Statler Brothers

I was born in California, but raised in Texas. My Mom & Dad were raised in Hawaii and Arizona, respectively. We moved to Texas just before I turned six.

One day in, and my mom had affected her southern drawl. It would stay with her until they moved back to California 14 years ago.

My parents are not "Southerners," but we had a good time eating their food, and listening to their music. I had a great time trying to explain why I was in thee-ATE-r instead of football.

So, The Statler Brothers are not from Texas, but they remind me of Texas, especially around the time before I was old enough to drive and control my own tape player. Somehow, these guys found their way into the happy part of my subconscious. I'm not afraid to admit some Jimmy Buffet albums live there too. My parents were parrot-head wannabes. From the Statlers and Buffet, I went straight into Peter Gabriel's early solo stuff. I'd love for someone to explain that jump to me.

Years later, I lived in Portland, OR and started a group theater with some very good friends right out of college. We were awesome, and I can only imagine how much more awesome we'd be if we had the internet back then. We got into a great space in the northern-est part of the city, and were given free reign to turn it into a workable stage for our inaugural season. We built risers for the seats, painted the whole damn inside black, built a tech booth, entrance hallway...basically we created our own little fire hazard. But dammit, it was OUR fire hazard, and it only cost us $200 a month! And we were only a short walk out the back to Burgerville. I can still smell the fast food trash.

So one night my friend, James, and I were prepping the set for our second show, working into the wee hours. We had only two CDs that I remember. The Pulp Fiction soundtrack, and Elliott Smith's "Roman Candle." We listened to them over and over and over. The P.F. soundtrack features a Statler Brothers song, "Flowers on the Wall." Immediately upon hearing this I remember all the energy in the world flooding over me. I could work forever in this doped up rush of spending my time doing what I loved without reserve, while a great, happy song from my younger soundtrack played over and over. James and I happily worked for hours, creating wood-paneled flooring with brown paint and a magic marker. We grinned like idiots and sang along while we put the finishing touches on a pretty believable (but small) bathroom, a closet with a false back (so he could slip out during a scene in the play) a sweet kitchen window and styrofoam panels made to look like a brick wall. We finally left when either the sun came up or we ran out of cigarettes. I had the time of my life that night.

The Poor Woman and I went to Portland in April, so I could show her around to all the places I used to be really poor and crazy. We stopped off at our old space. It's now a coffee shop/health food market. The stage is gone, it's now where the customers sit to munch on their food and coffee, but they kept some of our seats. That made me really, really happy.

Anyway, I hate the song "Elvira."

Elias Koteas is the poor man's Christopher Meloni

Way back in the '05, the internet was young, and the PMV blog began. Back then, coming up with names and comparisons was carefree, easy. I started a list, and in no time had three month's worth of entries at the ready.

This was one of them.

I hesitated with posting this for a number of reasons, primarily there were no high-res pictures of Elias anywhere back in the '05. You'd google images for Elias, and what you'd get was tons of low-res, tiny frame-captures from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

I couldn't do this to him. So I waited.

Just yesterday Mr. Berg suggested this coupling, I looked it up, and lo and behold: many a new photos of our favorite guy. Personally I think this is an apples/oranges comparison (they just look alike), and in any case I'd reverse this order, but Meloni has the L&O powerhouse behind him...and he's done some pretty damn funny work too.

Vice Versa is the poor man's 18 Again! is the poor man's Like Father Like Son is the poor man's Big

To leave my remarks on this post would only cheapen it.

Peter Bogdanovich giving an interview is the poor man's Jerry Lewis giving an interview

Indulge me for a second here.

The Mrs. & I just watched Paper Moon last night. Good flick. Anyway, after the movie we watched the interviews with the people behind the movie. Peter Bogdanovich being front and center. As I was watching this, I remembered just how self-involved an impression ol' Petey gives off. He wants to be old school Hollywood so badly. It's cute.

Exhibit A - His bandanna-scarf. If you're gonna do unnecessary neck ware, at least go for the silk ascot.
Exhibit B - Name dropping. One name in particular. He could be ordering an egg-white omelet, and he'd still manage to fit in an Orson Welles anecdote just before he asks for fresh-squeezed orange juice.

But most importantly:
Exhibit C - That thing he does with his glasses, usually when he's trying to make a point. He's looking at his interviewer, head slightly down, all hangdog eyes and such, then he adjusts the frames of his glasses when he says something of himself in which he's particularly proud, or something he deems is "important." (quotes used to add "emphasis")

The glasses do not need readjusting. It's his tell.

The only other person who does this better is Jerry Lewis. Watch interviews of him in the 80's, when he started to distance himself from his younger, "hey lady" image. He speaks as if he's giving the sermon on the mountain. Deeper voice, careful pauses, use of unnecessarily big words. He so desperately wants to be taken "seriously" in the 80's. Mr. Lewis, I saw Hardly Working, and I still want my $2.00 back.

I couldn't find a picture of this adjusting of the glasses action, which is unfortunate. Either you know what I'm talking about, or I might have lost you completely. This is the type of person who, upon receiving an award at a gala event, looks out at the audience from on stage and makes that annoying, pretentious, praying hands bow thing.

What the hell is that????

Oh, and the only person who does the glasses thing better than Jerry Lewis is Martin Short, impersonating Jerry Lewis.

East Coast Classic Rock Radio is the poor man's West Coast Classic Rock Radio

Been silent for a while. Shot two commercials, wrapped up our Channel 102 series, writing a treatment, working for a friend, attended a funeral (out in Washington, which inspired this post).

I could do without so much Billy Joel.